The Boy that Was
By: John Andrade
When I first moved to Los Angeles with my parents I was called Lance, but that would change over the course of the first three months we were living there. I’ll start at the first day at school I was 14 and just entering high school I went through all of the normal orientation stuff at the school, but the story doesn’t happen until my gym class where some of the other boys in class had tricked me into walking into the girl’s locker room by telling me it was the boy’s locker room just when I got in there all of the girls screamed because they were already halfway undressed I ran out of the gymnasium and into the boy’s restroom where I could be alone to think about what the school admins were going to do to me as punishment for what I’ve done even though I was tricked into doing it. I was in the restroom for 15 minutes when the gym teacher came in and told me I wasn’t in trouble because they do it to every new student and he walked me back to the gym and told me on the way that the boy’s locker room was on the left as I walked into the gym. When we got back to the gym the boys that had tricked me into walking into the girl’s locker room were gone and I went into the locker room on the left and started to change when the gym teacher said that after gym I would have to shower as he handed me a bag of clothes which contained shorts and a t-shirt with the school’s name on it and a gray sweat suit. The teacher told me that those would be my gym clothes and that I would be responsible for washing them at home as every day after class they would give us a bag that blocks odors so they wouldn’t stink up our locker in the hall. The gym teacher also showed me where the towels were so I would know after class. I changed into the shorts and t-shirt as the teacher instructed me to and went back into the gym and lined up with the class as the teacher instructed us to. We had to do a fitness test which was rope climbing, push-ups, sit-ups, and all the other stuff you’d do when you work out. After class was over everyone headed back into the locker rooms girls into theirs and boys into theirs and took showers. Inside the locker room all the other boys were just striping down in front of everyone else with no problem some didn’t even use a towel to walk into the shower section there were penises of all sizes and I started to feel aroused by the sight of them and couldn’t take my shorts off as I had an erection and it would be noticed by the other boys and they would say something about it or call me a faggot so before I striped down I thought about something that wasn’t sexy at all and it went away so for the entire time I was in the locker room I looked down at the floor at all times so I couldn’t see their penises. At the time I thought it was normal and that all boys had those thoughts so every day I had gym class and had to shower I just looked down at the floor, because seeing my own penis was the only thing I wanted to see until one day the girl’s locker room was being fixed because their showers weren’t working properly so the school had to have the boys and girls share a locker room and take showers in shifts the girls would shower first then the boys, but after a week of that it was taking too long for the students to get to their next class so the school admins had divider walls put up in the locker room and shower section so most of the boys were trying to spy on the girls, except for a few of us who just wanted to shower and get to our next class. When one day I had forgot about the divider and walked onto the girl’s side and saw the girls showering, but they didn’t see me so I went onto the boy’s side before they saw me and told the teacher that’s when I noticed I didn’t get erect when I saw the girls naked and the thought that popped into my head was, “why didn’t I look like that?”. Some of the boys saw that I was coming from the girl’s side and asked me what I saw I told them nothing, but they knew I was lying and the one noticed I wasn’t erect and called be a “faggot” because of it I ignored him and took a shower and continued my school day. When I got home I when into my room and to change out of my school clothes and while I has in my room I was looking in my full length mirror at myself naked and I tucked my stuff between my legs to try and picture myself with girl’s parts and I oddly could see myself as a girl my parents weren’t home at the time just my sister who had walked in on me she walked in on me and saw me, but she didn’t say anything she just looked at me and asked if she could dress me up as a girl and I told her she could to which she went to her room and grabbed her makeup kit and some of her old clothes from when she was 14 and did my makeup and gave me some skinny jeans and what was called a deep-v t-shirt, after I was fully dressed and made over I looked in the mirror and there was a bulge from my penis so my sister looked up online how to hide it and she found a website about drag queens and how they hide their penises when they put on show so my sister helped me do the same by following the instructions on the site when she was done I pulled up my underwear and pants and looked in the mirror and liked what I saw and I looked like a pretty girl. I got undressed before our parents got home, but beforehand my sister asked me if she could enter me into a drag queen contest that she saw on the website that was aimed at preteen drag queens so I told her she could sense it was in the summer and it was in Las Vegas, Nevada no one from school would be able to recognize me if they saw me. So come summer vacation me and my sister spent it in Las Vegas, Nevada at a drag queen show, but when we got in the car I asked my sister if I could be dressed as a girl the whole time we were in Nevada and she said what about the contest, so I told her I wanted to see if I could pass as girl for the entire summer vacation and we could still enter the contest as well. That summer I was a girl and she had loaded up her car with all of her old clothes for me including an old one piece swimsuit that she used when she was on the high school swim team which was black and red which I tried it on when we checked into the hotel where the drag queen contest was I was scared that the tape would come off in the water, but my sister found some waterproof tape which was clear and worked to hold everything in place and it made it so if someone were to see me they would think I was a girl out for a swim with her sister. The contest wasn’t until the last day of our trip and I could pose as a girl until the contest was to begin. The trip was fun and everyone who saw me really thought I was a girl, it was the best time I had all summer during the contest I won and we went back home and told our parent of the trip and contest and to my surprise they were happy that I won, but I didn’t know is my sister had told them it was a drag queen contest so I was surprised when they asked me to dress as girl to which my sister took me into the room and had me dress in the clothes that I won the contest in and when I went back into the living room the curtains were drawn closed so no one could look in and my parents said that I looked just like a girl as I had let it grow longer over the last few months and always had it in a ponytail. When school started I decided not to cut my hair and leave it long as I liked it that way, in my second year of school I had made some friends a girl and boy of course we didn’t meet by choice as we had always sat at the same table at lunch time during school and we talked every day from that point on. At lunch they complimented me on hair and that they liked it long some of the other kids said I looked like a girl, but that didn’t bother me as I wanted to look like a girl. During gym class the other boys in the locker room made fun of me because of how I looked then one time during gym class some of the 12th graders were in the locker room waiting for because I had volunteered to help clean the shower sections of the girls and boys locker rooms I did the girls first because in my eyes it would be easier to clean which I was right and it only took me 15 minutes to do so, but when I went to clean the boy’s locker room shower some older boys were waiting for me in the shower section where they said, “Look it’s the boy who wants to look like a girl.” To which I replied and to this day I don’t know why I said it out loud, but I told them that I was a girl and they then grabbed me I tried to run away, but they were just too strong for me they pinned me down and unbuttoned my pants pulled them down along with my underwear and one of them said, “Let’s show this faggot what we do to girls.” And he stuck his penis in my ass hard and it hurt. I tried to scream, but he covered my mouth with his hand and push his penis in all the way and then when he was done his friend did the same thing until they had both cum inside of me and they left. I could feel myself bleeding and all I could do was lay there and cry softly. After an hour my two friends and gym teacher came in and found me on the floor bleeding from my ass. My friends stayed with as the gym teacher called 911 and my parents when the ambulance came the EMTs checked me out and loaded me inside and got me to the hospital where after three hours the police were there waiting to take my statement which I gave them. While I was in the hospital the two boys had come into my to “visit me” and they said that they didn’t like snitches and closed the curtains to my room and one covered my mouth while the other cut my genitals so badly that I would need surgery to repair them. After that attack because the door didn’t lock hospital security came in and pulled them off of me and had the police arrest them right there while the doctors patched me up and then let my parents talk to where I told them I was girl trapped in a boy’s body and they said, “ok” and left it at that the doctor came back in and said I would need surgery to repair my genitals, but I asked him if I could get gender reassignment surgery and he asked my parents if that was ok with them and they told him it’s what I wanted which it was what I wanted he told me that I didn’t have to get the top surgery if I didn’t want to, but I said I did and he said it would only be limited to the size of what 14 year old girls would have I told him that was fine. It’s been two years now I’m in the 12th grade and living as a girl and I’m happy. The boys who raped me are in jail for a long time and I’m okay with that it’s what the deserve for what they did to me I run the Trans-ally club at my school and so other LGBTQ people can have a place to express themselves freely without judgement from others.